Today definitely is not one of the best days since I am here. I have woken up at 4.20 and can’t fall asleep. I feel week, I feel dizzy and my stomach is upset. When I try to get up, I get a head rush. Basically this morning has started very very bad for me. Physical weakness has always put me on the kneels mentally. I write a desperate message to Ben, but of course, we have different time zones and I don’t get an answer till after couple of hours.
At 7.40 I am a regular patient in the doctors’ office nowadays. Basically I am there almost every morning. Telling them what hurts or what doesn’t feel right. They know my case by heart I guess 🙂 I ask doctor what to do, because all the dizziness is only one part of the story. Other is that in the time slot from 4.20 to 7.40 I have been going to the wc 3 times (and sorry for being so frank here, but this is quite an important part of the story. And anyway – knowing me, you know that I am rather direct always. And knowing me you know that this is the main issue I wanted to address here anyway :))
Doctor tells me that I have eaten something oily in the restaurant, because all the medicine they are giving me are against diarrhea. It is meant to treat it all but since I am here, nothing seems to be treated. (Ben later sees irony in this fact. Of course, there is an irony there). And also, maybe because of the language barrier I don’t feel that all the things are explained to me properly. All they refer to is special food that is good for me, special medicine to treat me and that is it… At this point I feel helpless. And alone.
When going to breakfast, I feel so dizzy that I am telling to the doctor on duty in the restaurant, that I am going to go back to the room and lie down. She arranges breakfast for me in the room. Some toasts and tasteless rice soup. I am really looking forward to going back home and have.. tomatoes (which they don’t have here at all. Or at least they are not serving them) 🙂
Getting better? Or not?
Also today massage is very light and not long. I don’t want to harm my body. Even though the sunburn is getting better, I don’t think that the skin should be damaged on any level at this point. After the massage I go back to the room and sit all oily on the balcony (as my room was cleaned at that point). Of course, my dear massage girls Saagarika and Sagatuna (not sure if the second is correct name though. Will have to ask her one more time… Don’t know why it is almost impossible for me to remember their names) have spoken to the doctor and she brings me a special liquid that I have to drink trough the day and we are stopping with all the other medicine.
She says: all the medicine we gave you were to treat you, we don’t have anything else besides this liquid (decoction) to give to you. That of course puts me in a despair. And also make me realize how stupidly I have once again fallen in the trap of expectations. I expected that it will get better in 2 weeks. Just because back home it was helping. But then I didn’t realize that here things are not the same… Here we are chain clients, mostly of whom come for some relaxation and weight loss… And whilst relaxation is indeed what you can get here (and weight loss is something that I think I have got because of the effect of the medications that have made me run to the toilet for 2 weeks), I surely don’t think that my real issue has been solved.
Or at least in my understanding. I really do understand that the effects of an Ayurvedic treatment are slow. It is not like Western medicine that gives you a quick fix to the problem but doesn’t address the root. Ayurveda addresses the root. But sometimes the root is very very very deep. So, my approach now is to stop the medicine and pray to be better by the time I am going back home. Which is in 2 days.
Funny fact: even though people keep coming to Sri Lanka for Ayurvedic treatments, Srilankans themselves firstly choose Western medicine. They say it is quicker… What do you get out of that? That they also want a quick fix even though they know the benefits of Ayurveda? Or should I be looking more sceptical at this fact?
Evolution of the day
I sleep during the day and afterwards it seems to be a little bit better. Of course, that is a mirage in the desert as later on I fall back into falling nauseous, dizzy, weak and going to the toilet. When the dinner time comes, I go to the restaurant and talk to the doctor. After long consultations between the two of them, they agree on calling a Western doctor and stopping with all Ayurvedic treatment for me.
The doctor arrives later on to my room with a beautiful smile and a stunning daughter of hers (there are so many beautiful people. Not only girls, but the whole nation is rather beautiful). She does the regular Western doctors’ stuff that we all know. And in the end she concludes that I have had some bacteria (which is rather easy to get on trips as you are not used to the new environment) that has caused this (so called travelers’ diarrhea).
What she does, she puts me on antibiotics for 2 days – in order for me to be able to fly back home. Also: I can eat only carbohydrates and not eat any vegetables (which is funny because they serve mainly vegetables here). So, my breakfast, lunch and dinner will consist of either some rice and toasts or some potatoes, or some pasta… Have to look up on Internet some other items I can eat..
I don’t know how all this makes me feel. I have not foreseen this turn. And life once more taught me not to plan everything in advance in my head and already imagine what the outcome should be. Maybe this it the main lesson for me to learn. Not living in the future, but live it day by day, moment by moment, NOW.